I've got some. Some days, I read the news and I just want to crawl under a rock and let the world go crazy without me. School shootings, mall shootings, runaway government pushing its nose into every tent. They who still have the power to help themselves scream at the slightest inconvenience, until they get money dumped on them, while others who need help suffer their days in silence, forgotten and ignored. Some days I just want to walk away and let the lights go out. I just want to raise my son, protect my family, and let the chips fall where they may. The truth is, I can't. WE can't. Because when the lights go out, we know who will creep in the darkness. We know, deep down, who will suffer the most; it surely isn't those who most deserve it
No, when the lights go out, the power mad will reign. Our enclaves will surely be accosted from all sides, and no Galt's Gulch or mountain hideaway will be protection. When the lights go out, the cruel will sieze the world in clammy fists, and they will squeeze what they want from it. The tyrants will hold sway, and the weak will suffer. And we, who prepare, who warn of the danger, who set ourselves against oppression, will be like candles in the darkness- few, bright and fragile.
What will we do, when the darkness rises? Will we stand fast, and bear as much of the world as we can? Will we turn our backs on the cries of children? Will we stumble, and find in ourselves a mirror of those very ideals we resist? Who are we, in the dark?
I do know this- I cannot turn my back. I cannot turn away from the suffering of others, if I have some means to ease their woe. And so, I will remain, though I feel the tide of darkness rising about our feet. Gather yourselves, and steel your resolve. A shadow grows in the world, and there is much to be done if we are to survive it.
The craziness is why I prepare, not for myself but for my family. I want my boys to have a better childhood. Sometimes, I can see the light coming down the tunnel, before I have the chance to get out of the tunnel. I know it's a train, and all I can do is prepare. I often wonder why I'm the only one that can see it coming. I don't know...I just hope I'm wrong, but I doubt it.
ReplyDeleteNo, K, you arent the only one who sees it, but I'll be damned if I can see a way out. I see the little frays of our world and wonder how much of the fabric is left, but all too often it seems people just want to grab it and pull, with never a thought for those who fall through. So I stash away little bits of knowledge and skill, hoping some of it survives. Things like the bread, knowing how to make something from nothing. I want a good life for my son, but some days all I feel like I can aspire to is A life. I hope that none of us, or our children, ever have cause to use these skills for survival, but they'll be there if need be.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad that you mentioned bread. I was talking with another tech at my clinicals, and she gave me a sourdough starter. Thanks for the offer, put the postage into some Kool-aid and sugar for the stash. My kids always like some Kool-aid on our camping trips.
DeleteActually, I just figured I would give you an email update, since you were interested, and I haven't gotten the post up tha I have been meaning to. Don't get me wrong, I would send you some if you needed it. I wasn't looking for your mailing address- there's a reason we write under nomes de guerre, and don't put pictures of our kids on here. Anyhow, hope things keep well, and good luck with your starter!
DeleteI have been finding other distractions to take my mind off of it. I have as of late quit listening to talk radio as much. I still keep on top of the news, just in case something happens, but I try to keep busier with other things now.
ReplyDeletei just love how you air out your thoughts. what's happening at present times saddens me and makes me hopeless of living in a safe community.
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